Love What Matters Feature - Uncovering the Childfree Voice After Infertility

‘My (2016) miscarriage crushed me. I screamed and cried in the nursery closet, clenching my son’s wubby so hard my palms bled. I was inconsolable.’

At the ripe old age of 28, I decided becoming a mom was going to be my next big thing, which would have been laughable as an outsider looking in because Mark and I were not those people. We partied too much and worked too many hours and were too self-absorbed with our own little bubble to consider the expansion of family with humans.
Then my grandfather passed and my biological clock ramped up something fierce.
Let’s take it on, we agreed. Although we had both become well-versed in the gamble and trials of expanding our career paths, parenthood was simply unknown and daunting.
For us, it was never a question of how we would be as parents. We both knew the answer was…we would knock it out of the park. Not in a helicopter/perfect parenting way, more in a ‘we’re all in’ way. We were both perfectly capable of teaching and guiding and growing. It was literally the core of our jobs outside of the home, but in vastly different ways. The issue became, HOW were we going to become parents, because knocking boots the old-fashioned way was getting us nowhere.
As many can relate, once something in our reproductive system seems off, we get frustrated, and then we get moving. If you look at it another way, trying to conceive gave us a ‘no’ and we took that information and found a work-around. This cycle kept up for us until we whole-heartedly believed we had exhausted all our work-arounds from the reproductive NO. Mark and I spent six years trying to become parents, but ultimately walked away childless.

Continue reading my featured story over at Love What Matters

An invite for women and Infertility: a wellness retreat in Arizona

The InfertileAF co-Founders are at it again, taking on a new project and figuring out what's working while we build.

It's interesting because we both want to get it done right the first time, but we also know the need is there NOW so we're stumbling along and fixing/revamping to make sure people both understanding what we're offering AND know how and when to get on board.

We have run InfertileAF with full transparency of every mistake or blip or re-do along the way, and we do not plan to change that. We fully believe transparency is important and we hope it remains at the core of our company.


We know you're nervous to commit to the Immersion Retreat.

In fact, before we took this on, we spoke with a few people who've mentioned they've tried to make retreats work for them and their audience and they've never sold out or even sold enough to make it happen.

So we knew this was an uphill battle before we began, but we took it on for a simple reason:

We believe our audience is ready to take the next step. We believe in you. We want to walk beside you.

Isn't that poetic?

The Immersion Experience selling point is a climb, but infertility and life afterward are a climb, too.

Let's do a FAQ

I'm afraid I'm going to breakdown or find new trauma. Are you looking for my pain points?

First, you get to choose which issue we focus on for the weekend. This is driven by us but you get to decide what we work on. So, for example, if you feel stuck in a rut in your marriage, you can say that and we'll help you figure out the next best steps. If you say you're struggling with weight, we'll uproot the belief that's causing you to gain and/or not lose and also help guide you in a new direction.

The negative belief or reason for attending for each person may be very different, and that's okay. 

The weekend will be tailored to your needs that you present to us, not what we think you need. That doesn't benefit anyone.

Plus, we know it's uncomfortable and scary to open wounds that are holding us back, and we aren't here to hurt you. The question we want  you to ask yourself is: If you're not honest about your pain point, what's the alternative? Staying stuck? 

That feels shitty and gross.

This retreat isn't about triggering trauma or adding insult to injury. It's not a "Here's your problem, go fix it" event. 

Instead, it's an open conversation with friends about what's confusing or frustrating, so that - maybe - you can breathe on your own again, full breaths. And feel seen, heard, and validated.

It's as easy as finding the sticking points and using them as motivation (or leverage) to build a more dynamic, fulfilling life than feeling paralyzed. 

When the problem is yours - when you are SO CLOSE to it - it's hard to see the way out. Sometimes you just need a friend who gets exactly where you are.

That's where we come in.

What if I can't change?

Silly brain. Why are they so archaic?

The good news is you CAN change your thinking.
You CAN change your mindset.
You CAN become unstuck.
You CAN lived an enormous, fulfilled life beyond Infertility, whether you had babies, brought babies home or walked away from treatment all-together.

It's a lot, but you have us by your side helping sort through the muck.
We dig that shit.

And we'll talk about this again, but now might be a good time to research neural plasticity. 

We believed in ourselves and accomplished our goals, and when things come up in our own lives now, we're able to navigate them with more self-awareness, empathy, and drive to heal.

Because - the thing is - we can't avoid big, scary things. They happen. Life happens. 

Except: you can help make life happen FOR you instead of against yourself.

This work isn't about being perfect, it's about learning how to handle the next imperfect thing.

I'm Scared of the Cost.

Yes, this retreat is more than the $85 summit ticket back in April.

And we kind of feel like it's slimy practice to try to convince you how to spend your money, because your feelings and concerns are valid. Only YOU know what's in your bank account and how you need or want to spend it.

Especially those of you still in treatment (or staring it down).

Ultimately, you have to decide if the freedom from the pain you're feeling is worth the price of the ticket. There's no convincing we can do on our end to make you feel like it's worth it if you don't see the value.

So, we'll tell you about everything we're providing, but we can't be used-car dealers and vomit a sales pitch on you.

We REALLY want you to come and know you'll walk away a different person, but you have to want that enough to sign up.




And for your financial commitment, you will walk away with an action plan for greatness, a new-found confidence level and memories and friendships to last a life time. You will be:
  • Heard: to use your voice in a powerful way in every day interactions
  • Seen: to stand tall and proud in both your decisions and conversations
  • Validated: there's nothing like surrounding yourself with 24 other women who understand exactly where you are
  • Relaxed: Yes, there is a lot of hard work, but there's also downtime to relax and enjoy yourself, to have a glass of wine or nap and reflect. You get you time, too.
  • Determined: Using our tools for knowledge and support, you will depart Scottsdale with your best foot forward.
  • Empowered: three immersive days will jump-start your confidence to start implementing changes in your daily life. 
Not to mention, each day you will be fed with delicious chef-prepared meals, partake in soul-filling yoga and brain-stimulating meditation, witness the healing vortexes of Sedona and submerge yourself in our very own private, pool-side oasis. 

The best part? Learning and healing doesn't stop with this weekend. 

Because we believe in you and know new habit implementation takes time, we are giving all retreat attendees exclusive, FREE ACCESS to InfertileAF's guidance program, including training tools, resources and private email exchanges FOR THREE MONTHS.

 It'll be you and us, figuring out "What's next?" and "How do I get there?" together. 

We are committed to you, but our question is, are YOU committed to you?

If so, and are close to wanting to be there, your participation in this experience will help ensure others can have a similar experience later.





Child-Free Living and National Infertility Awareness Week

Looking for resources that talk about child-free living after Infertility?

Please listen to my interview on Inside Reproductive Health HERE

Please read my Personal Story on the Resolve website about child-free living HERE.

This year's theme for National Infertility Awareness Week is Infertility Uncovered.

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